Fuck No Homestuck Porn
So, firstly, you got this awful felt pen coloring going on - like look at that… bed??? thing??? and how the artist got lazy and just started squiggle filling. Then there’s that look of pain and sorrow when it’s probably supposed to be arousal. Those awful bead??? pearl??? things that look pasted on. That phallus that isn’t quite penis and isn’t quite tentacle and just looks awful either way. And THE INDEX FINGER ON ERIDAN’S RIGHT HAND. IT’S SO FUCKING GROTESQUELY LONG IT LOOKS LIKE AN OFFSHOT OF THE TENTABULGE MONSTROSITY. AND IT TOOK ME AGES TO FIGURE OUT THAT THAT WAS A FINGERNAIL AND NOT A FUCKING FLAME AT THE END OF HIS FINGER FOR NO GODDAMN REASON.

So, firstly, you got this awful felt pen coloring going on - like look at that… bed??? thing??? and how the artist got lazy and just started squiggle filling. Then there’s that look of pain and sorrow when it’s probably supposed to be arousal. Those awful bead??? pearl??? things that look pasted on. That phallus that isn’t quite penis and isn’t quite tentacle and just looks awful either way. And THE INDEX FINGER ON ERIDAN’S RIGHT HAND. IT’S SO FUCKING GROTESQUELY LONG IT LOOKS LIKE AN OFFSHOT OF THE TENTABULGE MONSTROSITY. AND IT TOOK ME AGES TO FIGURE OUT THAT THAT WAS A FINGERNAIL AND NOT A FUCKING FLAME AT THE END OF HIS FINGER FOR NO GODDAMN REASON.

Today’s contestants on Guess That Trace are…

Today’s contestants on Guess That Trace are…

Oh man I love the AU where Karkat is a tiny dwarf creature with horns that are strangely much more detailed than anybody else and Nepeta’s gloves are just some fucking splotches that don’t even cover most of the hand and also Nepeta’s vagina is radioactive

Oh man I love the AU where Karkat is a tiny dwarf creature with horns that are strangely much more detailed than anybody else and Nepeta’s gloves are just some fucking splotches that don’t even cover most of the hand and also Nepeta’s vagina is radioactive

wait why the hell was this on fuckyeahbadhomestuckporn this is utterly fantastic
(it might not animate on dash but dear god is it worth it do the clicky thing to see it on the blog)

wait why the hell was this on fuckyeahbadhomestuckporn this is utterly fantastic

(it might not animate on dash but dear god is it worth it do the clicky thing to see it on the blog)

I can’t… I don’t even no where to begin. So, all the anatomy lines on their chests are these awful fucking paintbrush tool squiggles, but there faces are done in a much smaller brush or the pencil tool, so it looks like someone drew awful faces and then shooped them onto someone else’s also tragically awful bodies. The hair work is… decent, I guess, but the squiggling all over a black fill clashes against the completely unecessary white glow stroke, the faces are awful, the horns only have two colors, and did I mention that the faces are awful? Also the ears. The ears suck.
Literally the only good thing about this picture is that the artist’s contact info font color blends right in with the damn solid background color, making it difficult to seek out more of their work. I guess that’s something.

I can’t… I don’t even no where to begin. So, all the anatomy lines on their chests are these awful fucking paintbrush tool squiggles, but there faces are done in a much smaller brush or the pencil tool, so it looks like someone drew awful faces and then shooped them onto someone else’s also tragically awful bodies. The hair work is… decent, I guess, but the squiggling all over a black fill clashes against the completely unecessary white glow stroke, the faces are awful, the horns only have two colors, and did I mention that the faces are awful? Also the ears. The ears suck.

Literally the only good thing about this picture is that the artist’s contact info font color blends right in with the damn solid background color, making it difficult to seek out more of their work. I guess that’s something.

"I bet you’re all wondering why I called you here today. This is the plan: We’re going to take a decent if uninspired idea for a Homestuck porn picture, and add in some basic knowledge of how to draw a face. Then we’re going to throw in really amateur shading work that could look okay at a distance, and then zoom in way too fucking close. We’ll seal the deal with a big slightly curved orange fleshy thing with a couple nifty action lines tossed on there in place of a penis. Then we’ll cap the whole thing off with the most unbelievably shitty necklace you’ve ever seen.
"I know we can do this, gentlefolk. We have the will, we have the uninspired inspiration, and we have the lack of well-rounded art skills. TO VICTORY!"

"I bet you’re all wondering why I called you here today. This is the plan: We’re going to take a decent if uninspired idea for a Homestuck porn picture, and add in some basic knowledge of how to draw a face. Then we’re going to throw in really amateur shading work that could look okay at a distance, and then zoom in way too fucking close. We’ll seal the deal with a big slightly curved orange fleshy thing with a couple nifty action lines tossed on there in place of a penis. Then we’ll cap the whole thing off with the most unbelievably shitty necklace you’ve ever seen.

"I know we can do this, gentlefolk. We have the will, we have the uninspired inspiration, and we have the lack of well-rounded art skills. TO VICTORY!"

Pictured here is Rose, singing praises to the sun after a successful medical procedure to remove her legs and replace them with ones made of play-dough and terrible foreshortening, and slightly move her vagina over a couple inches onto her right leg. Meanwhile, Terezi is now taking over for the Grim Reaper’s job since they’re on holiday right now. However, everytime she takes a soul she loses some flesh and gets more skeletal, so this time she’s keeping a hand on her boob to see if it noticeably gets smaller after she reaps Rose.
Well either that, or some fantastically awful bondage porn by someone who has no practical idea what bondage actually entails, and thinks anatomy is what you call something that has a lot of atoms.

Pictured here is Rose, singing praises to the sun after a successful medical procedure to remove her legs and replace them with ones made of play-dough and terrible foreshortening, and slightly move her vagina over a couple inches onto her right leg. Meanwhile, Terezi is now taking over for the Grim Reaper’s job since they’re on holiday right now. However, everytime she takes a soul she loses some flesh and gets more skeletal, so this time she’s keeping a hand on her boob to see if it noticeably gets smaller after she reaps Rose.

Well either that, or some fantastically awful bondage porn by someone who has no practical idea what bondage actually entails, and thinks anatomy is what you call something that has a lot of atoms.

I was going to make fun of the fact that there’s a fucking bucket blocking what is probably awfully drawn genitals or just a big blank space because the “artist” only knows how to trace shitty porn and not actually do anything not creatively bankrupt.
But then I realized that this looks familiar, and I think this is a trace of one of those Frank Miller Superman comics where he and Wonder Woman bang in Space. I think there were multiples of these.
So now I’m just conflicted on whether this is terrible or wonderful.
But then I look at the dialogue and it takes all my willpower to not throw my router into the sun, so I never have to read this shit again.

I was going to make fun of the fact that there’s a fucking bucket blocking what is probably awfully drawn genitals or just a big blank space because the “artist” only knows how to trace shitty porn and not actually do anything not creatively bankrupt.

But then I realized that this looks familiar, and I think this is a trace of one of those Frank Miller Superman comics where he and Wonder Woman bang in Space. I think there were multiples of these.

So now I’m just conflicted on whether this is terrible or wonderful.

But then I look at the dialogue and it takes all my willpower to not throw my router into the sun, so I never have to read this shit again.

I never knew how much I wanted extremely badly animated gifs of mannequins bumping into each other over and over while one has an angry expression pained on its face until now.
Which is not at all.

I never knew how much I wanted extremely badly animated gifs of mannequins bumping into each other over and over while one has an angry expression pained on its face until now.

Which is not at all.

fucknohomestuckporn:

WHYYYYYYYYYYYY

memories

fucknohomestuckporn:

WHYYYYYYYYYYYY

memories

Is this blog still alive
Anonymous

nope

jfc i just read through this entire blog and no kidding this is my favorite homestuck porn blog ever you are brilliant please never change

yes~ i like too ask if you draw any and can i ask that you draw me one no one for the past mouth since i join draw me anything 3':

I love you for doing this. :D
Anonymous

This query isn't about porn per se, but do you know of any nifty guides on figure drawing? Just wondering. I really love the blog, I adore your critique/commentary.
Anonymous

Unfortunately, I do not. However tumblr is filled with them, if you went to actual artists and asked them, I’m sure they could point you in the right direction. I’m no artist, I’m just some asshole on the internet who thinks they know a little about art.